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Musings & Meanderings: On Being in Flux

in Home, Musings & Meanderings

Rainbow Cottage living room

Rainbow Cottage living roomI have to admit it. I’m not crazy about being in transition. I’m a triple earth sign, with a double dose of Taurus (moon and rising signs). And we Taureans like to stay put, rooted and grounded in the fertile earth, taking time to smell the roses.

But it seems like my whole life is in transition these days. Every morning I get up and check my to-do list. Instead of things like “write blog post” – “plan next online course” – “study TeachNow materials” – “write info/sales pages for October workshops in Texas” . . . my to do list says:  Clean carpets. Wash windows. Declutter closets. Buy new bedspread. Weed the flowerbed out front.

We have moved almost half our “stuff” into storage already (including furniture), and stripped the walls of personal photos and mementoes. The house is feeling like it’s halfway between our space and something staged so a potential buyer can imagine herself or himself living here. And I’m OK with that. Once we made the decision to move back to the island, I was all in. I like this house a lot — it’s a really lovely house (the photo above is the living room) — but I don’t love it the way I love Heron House.

There’s still a lot to do. The house will go on the market by May 9th. That’s the plan.

I am sensing an inner shift that is aligned with this outer shift of moving back to the island. I can feel it, but cannot yet articulate it. And that’s probably how it should be, for now.

Cleo, 4.23.14I also lost several nights’ sleep this past week, worrying about our sweet kitty Cleo. She’s been ours for 16 years. We lost her mother Smokey last fall, and after taking Cleo to the vet this week, we knew it was time to let her go too. So Craig and I spent one last day with Cleo, then took her in, and loved her and petted and stroked her as the vet put her to sleep. I was a basket case the rest of the day. Still missing her.

Just as it is with humans at end-of-life, so it is with beloved pets:

In the end, all that matters is love.

I am headed out on retreat this weekend, which I sorely need. This private retreat with a group of women I have yet to meet has been on the calendar for months, and I have to say the timing is pretty perfect. I need a break from cleaning and decluttering and crying over Cleo.

And the rain is just pouring, pouring down.

Blessed be the sweet spring rain.

A few things that lit me up this week:

I love how the community is coming together in the new Gaian Soul Circle. People are introducing themselves, discovering shared interests and connections, and sharing how they do their daily practices, among other things. It’s a place of friendship and inspiration. I am really happy with how it’s going.

I took one of those online quizzes — What’s Your Decorating Style?  Why yes, I am Rustic with a dash of Coastal. Why am I not surprised?

On Earth Day, I loved this post on romancing your land base. Yes!

And this one, an updated version of a bioregional quiz that I’ve used in workshops for many years. Looking forward to taking it again when I have a bit more time.

Two of my favorite teachers, Starhawk and Jon Young, discussed how rekindling our connection to nature heals both the Earth and humans (one of my favorite themes). Sponsored by the Pachamama Alliance.  You can watch the video of their conversation here. It’s a good one.

Thoughtful, sparkling comments. . .

  • Kim Antieau Fri - Apr 25th 2014 11:07 am

    I’m so sorry about Cleo. But congratulations on your other transitions. I hear ya. But sometimes it’s in those in-between places where we find the most magic and healing. xoxo

  • Callahan McDonough Fri - Apr 25th 2014 11:11 am

    Agree transitions hard unnerving juicy & what is so after a bunch of flip flopping. So looking forward to meeting you soon. Peace ‘n hugs.

  • Otter Fri - Apr 25th 2014 11:14 am

    So sorry to hear of Cleo’s passing. My heart is with you.

  • Barbara I. Fri - Apr 25th 2014 2:46 pm

    Joanna, my heart breaks at the loss of your beloved Cleo. We lost our 16-year-old calico last summer, so I can completely relate to how you’re feeling. And you’re so right, all that matters is LOVE, and I’m certain she was cherished and knew it. Watch for the little signs that show she’s still with you, little serendipitous moments. Our sweet Annie, in an amazing sequence of events, actually led us to our recent addition, a 13-year-old gentleman who had been looking for a home for nearly a year, but had been overlooked because of shyness and age. I never thought I could let another kitty into my heart so soon, but Annie felt otherwise and knew this sweet boy needed a home. These wise creatures teach us so much if we listen with our hearts. Hugs to you Joanna!