My mermaid sister Nora, who is at end-of-life, dictated this letter to me and I typed it up. It is loosely based on a piece that Nora has used many times in her grief workshops, from the book “Life After Loss” by Bob Deits. Every time I read it out loud to her so she could edit and refine it, we both cried. Blessed, blessed be.
April 25, 2013 – Full Moon in Scorpio
Dear Family & Friends,
I want to share with you some of the thoughts and experiences I am having.
I know you are experiencing a loss that is devastating. I am also experiencing a great deal of my own grief as my end comes closer.
Things I did not expect to change, have changed. I cry more than usual. My tears are not a sign of weakness, or of lack of hope or faith. They are the symbol of the depth of my loss, as I approach the crossing of the threshold.
My tears connect me to the waters of the world, and hence to each of you.
Sometimes I am crabby and cranky, or just darned exhausted. Please understand that my emotions are heightened by the stress of grief. This is not a reflection of you. I want to stay connected, however the need for comfort and privacy means that I need local friends to call to make arrangements before coming to visit.
Thank you, those dear ones who have honored my request to call first before coming over. Thank you for not being offended if I say no. Often times I just don’t have the strength to talk to you or to see you.
But I am not always sad as I go through this experience. I have learned a lot about the people who love me, and how deep that love and happiness can grow. I am especially grateful for the times I’ve been able to go down to the water’s edge. The sunshine and salt water are my medicine.
I cannot express how deeply I appreciate the notes and messages you have posted or sent to me. I do not have the energy to respond, but please know how very much I appreciate your words and the memories you have shared with me.
Thank you for the many, many candles you have lit for me. Thank you for praying for me, for circling, and holding vigil. I can feel your energy sustaining me and holding me in a cradle of love.
Just know this: We may think in our hearts and minds that things will always remain the same, and even though we have solid plans that we have spoken aloud and affirmed to dear friends — our plans can change. We have to be open to change, we have to flow with it.
Thank you for loving me. It’s made this life worth every moment.